Conservative Focus On What Really Matters

We hold the gravity of these ignorant and selfish concerns to be self-evident

Gas must remain artificially-cheap that we may commute like overstuffed sausages in giant roadhogs

Never shall taxes be increased to pay for costly, tried-and-failed, bleeding-heart social programs

Nitwit foolishness such as this pukish recycling nonsense usurps our hallowed individual freedom

And abortion shall remain foremost among the violations of our savior’s will which must be rectified

The omnipotent blind hand of the free market shall be our blunt tool in repairing all societal issues

Gun control must come to mean simply that wives and children hold steady aim at intended targets

Without reflection, we remain unflinchingly positive that This is ThE greatest country on the planet

Fool intrusions into private enterprise like mercury limits on power plants simply cannot be tolerated

We shall strive to bring God into our government while keeping its regulators out of our businesses

Our borders have to be secure but we must hire workers for those jobs real Americans just won’t do

High taxes and intrusive rules kill the patriotic initiative of our bold, job-creating entrepreneurs

Our children shall lead the world despite their pathetic global status in reading, math and science

Bringing prayer to school ranks right up near the top of any list of the most important issues we face

Government-run bureaucrat-controlled Death Panels must never control our choice of a family doctor

Global Warming is just an unproven, junk science theory - Undeserving of any government concern

Our leaders must make the important decisions in private conversations with their personal saviors

Always remember that the bible plainly states: Marriage is a contract between a man and a woman

It goes without saying that we must outgun them all combined or be overrun by the godless heathen

We always have time to eat and drink while watching Football, for it truly reinforces our core values

Black-or-White, Right-or-Wrong, Heaven-or-Hell: That’s how we counter this elitist overcomplication

It is our god-given right to as many children as we see fit without training or income to support them

Texans epitomize the laissez-faire, ignorance-braced lifestyle that we should all be striving to attain

Government does best out of the way sos to let SmashAndGrab MultiNats rule from corporate closets

We must soldier on until that over-reaching, job-killing EPA is abolished and all its rules rolled back

Resolved: Our right to idle alone thru long drive-thru lines in 9 passenger SUVS shall not be abridged

Inexpensive meat, however produced, is going to remain front and center at all our family dinners

We must hold the line against overreaching so-called investments in whatever socialist infrastructure

Rich conservatives are obviously the ones who have the best interests of working people at heart :}

Scientific debates with donor implications can best be decided via slanted twitter opinion polls

Anonymized, sociopathic corporate clones in expensive suits are ideal for closet national stewardship

Obesity, high blood pressure and diabetes are matters of personal responsibility, not public health

We must promulgate our morality globally thanks to our god’s assigning us this Exceptionist role

It makes economic sense to live for free in homes with underwater loans sunk by drawing out equity

Everyone agreed social security was nearly solvent so naturally its payroll tax funding was cut

Permanently passing all cost increases onto patients will obviously fix our broken healthcare system

Loyal OutSourcers are striving to bring back middle class jobs for our deserving, talented workforce

Set Our Rulers Free Of Our Servitude

Said the price of freedom had to be eternal vigilance and war is an immutable part of our genetics

Said there is no other choice but blood sacrifice and no alternative but to go off and fight: For them

Said we got to be ever ready or our enemies will be upon us: Attacking, slaughtering and enslaving us

Said the bad guys are always on the verge of reigning over us in an unholy and totalitarian terror

Well now, who would the losers really be, in the long run, if all their projected fears came true?

Let’s say we don’t fight, but just peacefully resist until they kill us all. OK, where will they be then?

Who would do the good work keeping the world running safe and warm, supporting their delusions?

Who’d farm the scorched earth for nothing and rebuild their bombed arms factories for a pittance?

We could leave them alone and let them see how far they get and how long they would really last

Let their greed, violence and anger be the sole driver in developing our precious humanity

Leave them alone at each other’s lying throats, without us to convince, manipulate and sacrifice

Let their violent genes and selfish traits monopolize so only their gifted spawn enjoy what happens

What is our real loss after being slaves to the selfishly-vacuous fantasies of mouthy control freaks?

Really, to what end does this eternal and vicious cycle based upon their sociopathic needs continue?

So, how long will the manipulators remain without legions of honest and hard-working minions?

Wait…Perhaps a better world would emerge given the final and pure ascendancy of their kind: LoL

Maybe…But, without the cheering crowds, cheap labor and vast armies, wont their game grow dull?

For with no audience to listen and no subjects to control, what, then, is the real point of their lives?

And who would now perform the myriad of mundane tasks which have always been beneath them?

And, in the end, what have we, the passive, patient drones, actually lost in tossing off our serfdom?

Gosh, there’d be no writers for their clever and well-delivered hot air speeches – and no audience

Clearly, propagandizing only to each other without legions of cheering supporters won’t satisfy them

So their genocides and purges would only wipe out their own kind: Wow, that would be truly terrible!

Right… Can’t you just picture them painfully bent over in the rice fields, with no peasants to rule?

So why bring up more good kids in honest poverty to be sacrificed to their petty, ego-driven disputes?

Go on about your real business and leave them to stand up for themselves against their own vile kind

And should they call upon you for god, family and country, force them to lead in real battle as well

Really, give them the entire world and see just how they adjust to the new necessity of honest work

So, let’s set them free of the addiction to our slavery to feed their attention-seeking insecurity

Liberate them like the parents of twentysomething drug addicts – by not supporting their habit

Yup, the tough love of having them do their own lowlife tasks might even have some benefit

And if that doesn’t fix things, well, we wont be left still suffering from their cankered obsessions

Stop feeding their eternal and hopeless need to fill the insecurity that threatens them so much

An end to their marketed catchphrases and expensive slogans meant to enslave our imaginations

Grant them their freedom from our servitude and maybe we can finally actualize our own potentials

It’s the destructive co-dependency of the honestly-faithful and the amorally-insecure that must end