They keep gunning them fatass
pickups like overstuffed race cars so, yup, gas must still be too cheap
Know that’s true when I see them all idling in the ATM
drivethrus sippin lattes with the A/C on high
Since prices keep going up, we must still be getting a real
bargain on the World’s Finest Healthcare
Proud and ignorant patriots keep getting fatter so it looks
like factory food also costs a bit too little
God-fearing folks are still threatened by gun-controlling
socialists so we must not waiver in our faith
They continue flicking them fricking dirty butts all over
which says to me smoking should cost more
Millions of gallons of too-cheap water still wastefully
rinse BigAg poisons into our drinking supply
Sometimes almost hear their elitist propaganda so we need to
turn up freedom’s channel a bit more
Not everyone knows all the jingles by heart yet so we need
to try and increase our media penetration
The Okies keep making lots of new ATV trails in their
Colorado forests, so, eyeh, gas is still too cheap
Since we throw away ½ a million bags per minute, it’s
obvious that they should cost just a little…
Kids are texting so at least some form of literacy remains
to their surely-brighter-than-ours tomorrow
There’s still lots of room in Texas so we’re morally obliged
to keep on being fruitful
gospel spreaders
Not everything is duplicated in Spanish yet and you know,
that really is bringing us all closer together
Rightwingers continue tossing aluminum, glass and plastic
away as a real Traditional
Family Valueรค
Fastbuck developers still find it cheaper to rip up farmland
than to rebuild their decayed cheap shit
Miners and drillers remain more concerned with costly
regulations than about their poisoned messes
They still think teeny cars rob them of their manhood so
they drive giant SUVs to jobs in tiny cubicles
Not everyone is dumbed-down enough yet to uncritically
parrot each and every fake news headline
Only half of our graduates caint read so there’s still not enough
kids being shoved up from behind
Opinion polls prove that climate change remains just the
costly hoax of a few crackpot pergressives
We let our vampire electro-gizzies suck energy 24x7 so
there’s room for increases in electrical rates
Us fat, proudly-ignorant, couldnt-have-beens still mount our
blessed
loud Harleys, so there, by god!
Keep seeing lots of drunken jetski
mayhem so the water’s still too clean and gas remains too cheap
40% of babies are bastards so we must more forcefully deny
these sinners the evils of birth control
They still wont drive over 5 hours and stand in line longer
than all night for a little free dental care
Some of the debt-ridden outsourced have not cowboyed-up to
their Self-Responsibility
Kool-Aid, yet
So far, not all of us are dumbed-down quite enough to
swallow all their lame pre-digested soundbites
There’s still a few of the underclass that don’t believe
that tax cuts for the rich trickle down to them
Some idolaters remain convinced that the government should
keep subsidizing single-parent litters
Not everyone has totally rejected reason for unshakeable
faith yet, so good work still remains for us
TV must be way too cheap cause they keep paying $100 a month
to just keep it locked right on Fox
Since we can still afford the million$ per year-per soldier
overseas, we can keep exporting freedom
Gotta keep on subsidizing corn syrup cause there’s citizens
without any diabetes for us to pay for yet
Bound to keep our guard up what with new job-killing
regulations being floated each and every day
They
still assure us their people
are most precious and we keep trusting they’ll create good new jobs
