Our Right-Wing Savior Told Me So

He came to me in my darkest hour and gave me this faith so now I am pledged to spreading His word

God told me to run for office so, of course, I make my decisions with donor’s tutors and quiet prayer

I feel our country’s manifest and divinely-ordained exceptionism deep in my pledged-to-jesus heart

If the thousands of civilian dead during our liberations were so important - He would have told me

We must bring Gods voice into our government and encourage others to throw off religious dictators

Better a born-again one-day-at-a-time believer than some atheistic, jobkilling sustainabilly

After seeing their blasphemy, I just knew I had to shoot them all so I prepared my arsenal in secret

After breaking God’s law, that doctor pridefully thought himself outside His justice, then I took aim

God tutored me on our duty to retain the greatest military this planet has ever known - at any cost

Our repeated command that God Bless America is simply a reminder to His people of our special role

As they strapped on my bomb, they said I died a martyr while taking His revenge upon our enemies

Let no man question my religious belief for, unlike science, it is beyond any discussion or debate

God told me that he had always blessed only our believers in this sinful world full of false idols

Mine is a very personal faith, emerging from sober bible study and long periods of private prayer

And that faith sustained me thru the dark periods when I had to lay off so many longtime workers

It goes without saying that we have ThE moral imperative as granted only to us long ago by our Savior

Despite my 4 marriages, children out of wedlock and substance abuse, I am reborn as a child in Jesus

For it is only god’s will that separates our family from the poverty that is their cross to bear, alone

My unbending faith quells the fear born of naively trying to understand His Mysterious Ways

For only the fullness of time shall reveal the perfection of His plan, in which I am but a small tool

God revealed to me the prideful err of trying to replace His word with decadent scientific babble

Satan has captured their tongues and therefore do we cover our ears to safely abide in His message

Far better the safety and security of our blessed faith than the frightening uncertainty of rationality

My personal savior makes His wishes known to me in private conversations ending in thankful prayer

I need fear no evil for I am certain to spend eternity in that place He has lovingly prepared for me

I know Satan has their tongues as they lie, saying we barter fictional souls for an imaginary paradise

God has amply demonstrated the pointlessness of that meddling EPA but the blind will still not see

God has allowed me to dehumanize His enemies to the point they can be killed with no remorse

His law against all forms of contraception came in a divine revelation accepted as a matter of faith

So it is our duty to remain fruitful despite their sinful spread of that genocidal overpopulation myth

The falsehood that we merely trade addictions between drugs, alcohol, sex and religion is blasphemy

God made his will known to me and no government can enforce its will upon my conscience

We denounce those who ridicule our beliefs as silly, outdated and irrelevant costumed charades

God commands us to support the state of Israel against the filthy encircling Jihadists, at all costs

It was divinely revealed to us that we must bristle with weaponry against the filthy Christian hordes

God told me to take shelter in his revealed truth when threatened by their secular, so-called reason